Oh it's so comfortable

My brain is turned off during the day. It feels like when I'm with my kids, watching them play, feeding them food, my brain is turned off with the only focus being them.  When I finally get time to myself, which is in the shower or during mid-pee, I have random splurges of feeling blessed and feeling thankful that I am where I am in my life.  Then, last night, in the shower of course (where my brain works) I started to get angry with myself because I was so comfortable in my life.  Reading my sister and her husband's blogs about being missionaries in another world, forced me to think about how comfortable I am.  I don't think that's fair to God, me being comfortable.  I want to be able to not be comfortable, to step out on a limb and take risks for my faith.  Instead I sit in the shower (not literally sit, maybe just lean against the wall) and feel comfortable with my hot water and such.

Then, I think of how big of a change my husband and I just made.  We grew up in a church most of our lives.  Made friends, good friends, and then after, for me, 24 years of going to that church, we got up and decided that we were needed elsewhere.  It wasn't an instant decision.  It took over a year of prayer, of waiting, of discussing and then finally we knew that it was time.  No, we didn't fly to another country or anything like that, we simply drove in the opposite direction towards the church that we thought could use our talents most for.  I didn't want to "bury my talents" like in the parable Jesus told, I wanted to use them for the Lord.  And burying them we were.  Now I finally feel like I'm doing something good in my life.  I finally feel like the Lord is proud of me and my works. 

It's hard.  Leaving your comfort zone, leaving the circle of friends you have.  It took us over a year to just be able to say goodbye in our minds.  Slowly, one by one, we had to say goodbye in our hearts to those we loved and cherished, and watched grow.  But we knew that all of them were in the hands of the Lord, so who were we to worry?  We knew they would be fine and that we were needed elsewhere.  It took a huge push from the Lord but that push was what we needed to finally do what he wanted us to do.

Now we are slowly meeting new friends and it's a great feeling.  It really is.  Step out of your comfort zone for the Lord.  It's hard, it really is, but no one said life was easy.  It's not supposed to be easy.  Sacrifice your comfort for God.  After all, He did sacrificed his only Son for you.