Lose Control

Life isn't easy.  It was never meant to be.  The past few months I had to keep telling myself "God only puts us into situations that we can handle" and then I found myself asking God, "How much do you think I can handle?"  I always thought life was controllable.  I had a plan.  I planned how I wanted my future to be, what I wanted to do, and I counted on all of that and depended on those plans to follow through.  All throughout my life my plans were trumped.  Things happened and I had to alter my plan and change it.  Time and time again my plans kept on getting trumped and altered.  God was trying to tell me that I'm not in control, he is.  I can't plan for my life, because God is planning for my life.

My sister and her husband are missionaries and they are constantly called by God to go and follow his calls.  They walk in blind faith, knowing that God is leading them toward what He wants them to do.  I need to learn that, that is the lesson that God keeps trying to teach me.  I have to learn how to trust God and love him and know that He is in control of my life and that I do not need to fear.  God feeds all of the animals and all the little birds, they depend on Him for life, and He cares for them.  If God will care for His animals and creatures, I have to trust that He will care for me even more.

So even though I'm not in control of my life, I know that I will be okay.  I know that I am loved and I know that He will take care of me.  You can't plan for every moment of your life.  You need to trust God.

I trust God with my life.  I really do.  Now, after everything that has happened in my life, I know that God is taking care of me, because no matter how bad I think my life gets, I still feel His love, and His guidance.  I feel this through my family.  I feel this love through my friends who are there for me.  God takes care of me and I know it.  I'm not scared of what will happen in my future.  I know that God is holding me in the palm of His hands.  I can feel that He loves me.  It is an exhilarating feeling, knowing that I don't need to stress over my future because God is taking care of me.